Thursday, February 19, 2015

Beginning

Olivia-It wasn't nice cutting me off like that.
Me-We needed to have a cliffhanger. It heightens the drama.
Olivia-You have issues. Anyways, like I was saying, it started out in the outdoor cafeteria of our highschool. So B...I mean 'Laura-Beth'
Me-Your sarcasm is noted and not appreciated.
Olivia-Stop interrupting me. Anyway, Laura-Beth walked over and sat down with me, Matthew, and Justin (our friends), then pulled out three...tape players.
Me-I don't know how to record things to mp3, okay? This was easier.
Olivia-You're showing your age :)
Me-Screw you.
Olivia-So she handed us three tape players. You may have noticed that Laura-Beth has a tendency to be...not serious. At all. She's not silly, but she's not very grim either. So when she looked deadly serious at us, it was a bit of a warning. "I want you guys to keep these on you at all times." She said. "If anything comes at you, I want you to run to your bathroom or some other room with only one entrance and hit play. But don't do it until then."

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

...Stuff happened

Olivia: Wait, why am I writing this now?
Laura-Beth Me: Because this'll make more sense to the readers coming from your point of view than it would from mine.
Olivia: After everything that just happened, you're still concerned with posting to this blog? Why?
Laura-Beth Me: Stopping would be giving in to those upstart assholes.
Olivia: Alright...and the script layout you've decided to do all of the sudden?
Laura-Beth Me: So they can tell who's "talking" obviously.
Olivia: Why not just change the font, or do one person in italics or something?
Laura-Beth Me: Because I hate that little gimmick. Now start telling the story.
Olivia: One last question. Why are you stilling calling yourself Laura-Beth when that's not your real name?
Laura-Beth Me: Because I'm not just going to tell them who I am yet. Strictly speaking, I just told them that they could call me Laura-Beth. I never said that that was my real name.
Olivia: Why not just tell them that you're...
Laura-Beth Me: Hey! Spoilers!
Olivia: Dammit, this isn't a book! Can't you take this seriously?
Laura-Beth Me: They want to read this, they do it on my terms. It's been a rough five days, I'm entitled to my frivolities.
Olivia: I don't like lying about something so important.
Laura-Beth Me: Fine, there you go, I did strikethrough and put in 'Me'. This thing's been from my point of view the whole time, they should get what it means. Now for the love of hell, please tell the story!
Olivia: Fine. It started in the outdoor cafeteria of our highschool...

Friday, February 13, 2015

This is starting to get old

Ok, what the heck? Do creepy things just trawl Blogger to see if anybody's talking about them, and then show up to bug the people who do so? And to kill the people in the area? I've noticed a lot more weird stuff in town since I started this blog. And a lot more death, come to think about it.

So, yeah, lot's of people in the area dying lately. It's rather annoying. Fortunately nobody that I actually care about has actually gotten attacked...but if my theory is right, that might change soon.

Crap.

I'm going to go make some recordings, just in case. Talk to you guys later.

Monday, February 9, 2015

That escalated quickly

Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted in a bit. I had to...lay low for a while. Let's just say that the day after I got the package was not good.

So first of all, I met this idiot not long after I left the house to go to school who tried to sing the praises of Slender Man to me. You know, this loser-

Real Scary

Anyway, as I think I've made clear before hand, I am not a fan of tall, pale and spooky. So I punched the guy out and moved on with my life.  But then, as I was going through downtown after school, I met another idiot. This one told me to embrace the Archangel.

...I won't go into detail, but suffice it to say that I have...issues with the Archangel. We've met. It did not end well. 

And so, I responded to this jackass in a proportionate, mature way and threw him off the roof of a ten story building.

...

This is why I don't tell you people where I live, and why I bounce this through ten servers and four different encryption programs. 

So I holed up in a safehouse until I was sure nobody had noticed my act of proportionate retribution and am happy to say that I have now moved on with my life.

Monday, February 2, 2015

Nope. Just...No

Hey everybody! I got a mystery package today! I'm going to open it, but I thought I'd let you know what's going on because, well, opening mystery packages never seems to end well, surprise surprise. So, if you don't hear from me for a while, this will be why. I doubt I'll die though, so don't worry too much. I'm pretty tough.

So, let's see what we've got here...
An old NES. Huh. Odd. Let's see what else is in here...
An NES controller. Makes sense. Oh wait, there's a game cartridge in here. Let's see what we've got...
...No.

No, no, no no no.

NO.

Talk to you later guys, I've got to go find a sledghammer.

Thursday, January 29, 2015

My Favorite Song

Hey everybody! Thought I'd share my favorite song with you all. I considered doing a top 10, but I'm not Todd in the Shadows, so none of you'd care about a full top 10 anyway. Plus, I'm just lazy. So instead I just decided to skip to the top 1.

Also...uh...fair warning-I was getting stalked earlier today by a really tall, really skinny, really pale bald guy in a nice suit. Now, I only noticed him out of the corner of my eye a few times, so I didn't get a really good look at him, and there were usually a few hours between each time I saw him, so for all I know I was just going in the same direction as a tall, albino, bald lawyer a few times. But I doubt I'm that lucky. So, just so you know, this video might end up being a little messed up.
video
...What?

Just...what?

Screw you asshole! Seriously, whoever did this, I'm going to...damn it!

Why would you do that? What, are you anti P!nk or something?

I'm sorry guys. Apparently Slender Man is an immature, obnoxious little brat. Stupid little...I remember when people barely knew who you were twerp! You do not fuck with P!nk! 

Friday, January 23, 2015

Local Family Loses Child to Someone Calling Themselves 'The Rake'

Dammit. I was supposed to be able to get at least one post in that had nothing to do with the supernatural first! Get out of my town you stupid little pup! Nobody likes you! Go play in the woods or something! Agggh!